Upon reading today’s Portland Press Herald/Sunday Telegram regarding Father’s Day stories, I recall all the things my own father taught me. Quite often we are all quick to credit our mother’s for many things in our lives because they may be the ones who have spent the most time nurturing us along the way. I have been fortunate to have worked for my father for many years and learned many things from him.
             My sisters and I decided that this year we will stain our parents’ wheelchair ramp, which they built so my son could visit. As they are getting older the ramp will have more uses than just for a visit from my son. That will be our gift to our father.
             I think I can speak for my sisters when I say that we are all grateful we had a father who was very involved with our lives. We are all married and we have an idea of what kind of father we want our husbands to be, without comparing them to our father. Our father worked very hard, sometimes two jobs, and took some classes along the way when he could afford them. He made sure we had family time and every weekend we did something, even if it was a ride to New Hampshire. He treated our mother well and with respect which was the greatest gift he gave us. He made sure our home was peaceful and we felt safe. Today he says that his family is the most important part of his life. He is very glad that we all get along well and we are close. After all, he invested everything he had in us, and it was not monetary. Our parents could not afford to send us to college. I attended for a while with scholarships. My sister and brother both received their Associate’s degrees later in life. We were not given a lot of material things but our parents gave of themselves.
             My dad taught me so many ways to survive. He taught me some of his trade and his honest business skills. Aside from some very dumb mistakes I made, such as putting gasoline into the Salamander to heat the shop [surviving unscathed], knifing a pattern onto a plastic face that needed to be in reverse as it was a clear piece of plastic[thankfully not peeling it] and almost cutting his bench in half when I ran a Skilsaw across it without checking the depth of the blade, I learned to creatively solve problems from him. The incident with gasoline was not a good one. He yelled at me for a week every time he looked at me. I will never do that again, but from him I learned not to be too thin skinned either. 
            As his employee, he taught me to look at things and be observant. One example came when I was at an outdoor roller rink in Westbrook one day. I overheard one skater ask the rink manager the dimensions of the rink. They were both trying to figure it out, when I quickly blurted out the dimensions. They both looked at me a little puzzled. I replied, “Look, the rink is surrounded with 4x8 sheets of plywood.” They wondered why they had not thought of that. Well I can credit my father for teaching me those skills. 
             Another memory comes to mind. My father always told me to believe in your own talents. If you think you can do it, say that you can. Once I was interviewed by a woman whose daughter was having a large wedding. I went to meet her with my portfolio of sample work and I was also dressed professionally. She showed me the font she wanted me to use to hand letter all the envelopes. She asked me if could letter in that style. I replied, “Why yes, I can do that.” She requested I send her a few samples which I did. I practiced that font every night for 2 weeks before I sent the samples. Then I continued to practice it and became very good. I learned two things. Do not underestimate your own talent and always learn something new. I did just that. I credit my father for instilling that in me.
             I also learned that your name is the most important thing you have of your own. When people remember you, you want them to remember you in a positive way. This is not to say you will not make bad choices or mistakes. However, most importantly, you must get up if you fall down. Assume responsibility. He is self employed and is held in high esteem by his contemporaries and his customers. He taught me that if a customer is unhappy, you must do what you need to do to make that customer happy. That is good business.
            One other thing comes to mind regarding things my father taught me. He told me to ask permission is to put you at a disadvantage. When I took my new position at work a few years ago, I brought my large exercise ball from one office to the next. I took it to my desk. One twenty year employee asked if I was given permission. I told her that I was not going to ask for that. I sat on that ball for a month or so when a manager noticed it. To make a long story short, it took 3 managers to get the message to me that I could crack my head if I fell over at work so I was told I could not sit on it. I find it humorous that the message came from a high level manager who also wears heels. I certainly hope she does not fall over and crack her own head at work.  From this incident, I credit my father with two things. One is not to ask permission for everything and another is to always question things.
            Since it is Father’s Day, I would be neglectful if I did not thank my own husband for being a good father to his sons. He has advised them on girls, and got them involved with sports. If it had not been for him, we probably would not have traveled so much and seen so many things together. I would not have learned to love hockey had he not gotten our youngest son involved. He was there for PET meetings with our other son through school. He was always very involved with their schoolwork. Sometimes the boys will talk to their father about things that they do not speak with me about. This is ok as long as they can talk to one of us. He has made sure our son was involved with handicap skiing. He has taught them a strong work ethic. So I would like to thank both my husband and my father on this Father’s Day.
            
            Lastly, I would like to show my latest picture of the family of Canadian Geese that I have been observing. I always notice the father who stands strong by the side of the road, protecting his family. The babies are always surrounding the mother while the father stands guard at all times. I also witnessed them swimming in a line, with a parent at each end. They seemed to sway to the music of The Blue Danube across the water with all the babies in a queue. It has been a real pleasure to witness them from the road. Happy Father’s Day to all dads: especially my own. Love you Dad